So Sunday I had to give a talk in church. I've included it here in case anyone was interested. :) I think it went pretty well, I mean no one gave me dirty looks or disgustedly got up and left...so I'd say that was pretty successful. :)
Making Your Home A Sanctuary
In a world of chaos and turbulence we are given few choices where we can find refuge; the two most important options are the Holy Temple and the Home. Fortunately we live very close to several temples but at some point in your life you may find that you cannot make it to the temple because of distance, family circumstances or illness. We cannot live in the temple and many are unable to attend the temple daily so it is vital to create a sanctuary in own our home. The home is second in sacredness only to the temple as defined in the Bible Dictionary (‘Temple’, 781): The temple is “A place where the Lord may come, it is the most holy of any place of worship on the earth. Only the home can compare with the temple in sacredness.” Creating this sanctuary involves three very important areas: Spiritual, Physical and Emotional. If one of these areas is ignored the walls of your sanctuary has holes which can be infiltrated by the world. By addressing each area you can create a safe haven where you, your family and friends will enjoy and feel the Lord’s presence within those walls.
Many people address the area of Spirituality quite well because for many it is one of the first things that come to mind. It is vital to create a Spiritual stronghold where we are reminded daily of Christ. There are several ways to strengthen the Spiritual hardiness of your home although I’ve only concentrated on three: prayers, pictures of Christ and the Temple, and entertainment that invite the spirit. Having family and personal prayer each day creates a conduit between each individual with our Father in Heaven. Praying together creates family unity where the gratitude and needs of the entire family can be vocalized with one heart to Him. Individual prayer allows each of us our one-on-one time with Heavenly Father where we are able to talk to him plainly about our concerns and joys. Pray daily as both a family and an individual to help strengthen not only your own spirituality but the spirituality of your home. Pictures of Christ and the Temple remind us each day of covenants we have made or intend to make with our Heavenly Father. These can also remind us of the Atonement and all that Jesus Christ has done for us. Keeping these pictures in various rooms in our home allows us a gentle nudge during struggles and adversity as well as the reminder of how much He loves us and wants us to succeed. The activities we engage in for entertainment can add or detract to the spirituality of the home. Because of the wide variety of options it becomes imperative to choose activities wisely. Some widely accepted entertainment options available include movies, television, books, games and the internet. These choices surround us everyday both within the home and without, choosing activities that uplift and create positive feelings in you and your family is imperative to keeping your sanctuary strong. While television and movies have a rating system that we can use to make wide choices books, music and the internet do not. It is important not only to be choosey when selecting these activities but to be aware of the media and games your children are being exposed to outside the home at school and with friends. Making good choices in the home make it much easier to make good decisions outside the home. All it takes is one song, book, website, movie or television show to chase the Spirit from our homes. An interesting experience that my husband and I had a few years ago was when my little brother, Brian, and his girlfriend came to Utah for a visit and so we asked them to stay with us. During the first evening, Clint was upstairs working on something and so my two brothers and Brian’s girlfriend were chatting downstairs. Brian asked to play us some music that he said my mother and sister enjoyed and so I agreed, knowing that the music he listened to was generally not uplifting. While the music was playing something in our home changed, I couldn’t figure out what had happened but soon thereafter the three of them left to do something and Clint came downstairs and asked me “What happened?” I told him Brian had played us some music and then house felt weird, he told me that as soon as the music came on he felt the Spirit of the Lord exit our home. It still surprises me how different my home felt, it is a feeling I never want to experience again. Spirituality is an extremely important aspect of creating a sanctuary but it is not the only one to remember when setting out on this course.
Many people forget the second area in creating a sanctuary in their home. The physical state of our homes can create an atmosphere of peace or pandemonium. This is sometimes the most difficult area to address because those we live with affect the physical space within our walls. Our homes should be a reflection of the Temple and there are three main things which can achieve this goal including getting rid of clutter, keeping the home clean and free from dirt and grime, and realizing the importance of these simple tasks. When the home is in disarray it affects all aspects of our lives including our spiritual well-being. Having a home free from clutter, both visible and hidden, is essential. Elder Daryl H. Garn, of the Seventy, states that while building temples “contractors are told that all rooms in the temple will be finished and painted. That day in the temple, every room was painted white. Even the storage rooms and mechanical rooms were white. There were no dark places in the temple. (Ensign, October 2007, 23-25). This same philosophy should be incorporated into how we take care of our homes. Creating a clutter-free home requires time and dedication from each member of the family. It is important to start with one area, or if needed, one pile. Make final decisions about each item before moving on to the next. This task can be overwhelming if you have a lot of areas with clutter but you must finish this project or the clutter can multiply and take over. Keeping your home clean is another important aspect of creating a sanctuary. Creating a daily task list can keep this important part of keeping your home clean under control. This seems simple but sometimes the simple solutions can be the hardest to keep up with. In the July 2007 issue of the Ensign, Shirley Kline says “Everyday events in our home can seem so simple that we overlook their importance—like the children of Israel who were smitten by a plague of snakes. To be healed they had to just look at the brass serpent on a pole (see Numbers 21:8–9), but because it was so simple, many did not do it. “Because of the simpleness of the way, or the easiness of it, there were many who perished” (1 Nephi 17:41). Everyday activities in our homes may be simple, but because they are simple, frequent, and repeated, they offer important opportunities to build individuals and families.” (Three Tools to Build a Sacred Home, 44–47)
The final area is the Emotional well-being of your home. In 1984 President Spencer W. Kimball stated “The responsibility for each person’s social, emotional, spiritual, physical, or economic well-being rests first upon himself, second upon his family, and third upon the Church if he is a faithful member thereof.” (Liahona, First Pres. Message, And The Lord Called His People Zion). Although each individual is responsible for his or her own well-being it is our responsibility to teach them while young how to accomplish that. As children grow it is essential to help them feel like productive and important members of the family. This can be accomplished through involving them in simple tasks such as folding laundry, sorting clothes, easy cooking tasks, picking up their toys, sweeping, as well as a variety of other responsibilities. In our home Gweny, our 2-year-old, is in charge of giving the dog treats as well as helping me sort laundry and stir food. She feels accomplished as she completes each job and looks forward to performing it later. When I try to do one of these tasks she runs up to me or the pantry demanding to do it herself. Not only is she learning responsible behavior but she is also learning the value of work and the important role she plays in our family. It is also imperative to encourage children as they try new things and gain experience. As new experiences unfold expressing your feelings to your children helps them know that you are interested in their lives and value them. One way to accomplish this is sitting down to a family dinner and making this time together an event. Making sure that each member of your family is emotionally fed is vital to the strength of your sanctuary. When even one person doesn’t feel supported the sanctuary suffers and other aspects may soon begin to fail.
Strengthening the sanctuary of the home is accomplished through small steps in each of these areas. Perfection is not demanded but it is expected that we all give our best effort as we strive for this goal. Our homes should offer refuge from the world, create peace and harmony within our families and ourselves, and allow us to feel the guidance and love of Jesus Christ and our Heavenly Father. I know that if we address these areas our homes will become a sanctuary, our families will be strengthened and we will become closer to our Heavenly Father than we ever thought possible.
